Friday, July 10, 2015

Zeus Dreams that Mount Olympus is Filled with Makeup Brushes

A more peculiar cat, I know not. Zeus, as I have often noted, is less like a cat and more like some sort of extraterrestrial, or at the very least he's a feline aberration. Sure he does so-called cat things, periodically, but when he does there is a distinctly non-feline sensibility to the way that he approaches his world. At his very core, he is quite uncat-like, and his peculiarities lack clean categories associated with any specific species.
One of his greatest preoccupations, as you probably remember from this exposé on his proclivities, is the makeup brush. However, he has very specific taste, and for him everything pales in comparison to goat brushes.

He deftly breaks into closed cabinets behind closed doors to retrieve my old, but beloved, Guerlain goat hair brush. He then runs around the house triumphantly with it in his mouth as though doing a victory lap of sorts. While I was unwilling to sacrifice that particular goat to his demented cause, I was willing to give him the ungoatly brush shown in these pictures. This brush lacks that certain je ne sais quoi that his beloved goat hair brushes embody so perfectly, but in a pinch even a subpar brush will do.
There is a whole ritual associated with the worshipping of the brush: from smelling it, to touching it, to chewing on it. Each step is approached with a intense fervor and engagement. He becomes singular in purpose, and nothing breaks his focus as he worships the brush.
Examining the tactile effects of the brush is of paramount importance, and sniffing and rubbing always precedes licking, biting and chewing.
There is a certain elegance to the way that he gently caresses and marks his brush (yes, his brush since I sacrificed this one to the cause), and he always demonstrates a certain reverence for his beloved.
"Oh, how I love thee."
 "While this isn't my favorite goat, or a goat at all for that matter, I am growing quite fond of this brush."
"Now that feels delightful, and I can see why you rub brushes all over your face– even though it tortures me when you don't share them."
Once his eyes fall to half-mast, Zeus is ready to drift off into a peaceful slumber, and in his dreams he sleeps on a bed of the softest, and most exquisite, goat hair brushes– the likes of which are unknown to mere terrestrial beings.
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30 comments:

  1. LOL! While dog-sitting my son's little Italian Greyhound, I discovered she loves to be stroked with my Tom Ford bronzer brush--especially her tummy :-). I'm not about to donate one of my TF brushes to the cause any time soon, but I did find an old bronzer brush in my brush collection that is still fairly soft and so I'll see if she likes that one the next time I visit. When I told my son that his sweet Sophie loved Tom Ford, he said, "Oh, great! Just what I need--a dog whose into couture!"

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    1. Of course an elegant Italian Greyhound (one of my VERY favorite breeds of all-time) would covet the Tom Ford bronzer brush (unsurprisingly, Zeus loves that brush as well!). Couture dog? That's just plain good taste! LOL!

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  2. I laughed out loud reading this story, Helen. I hope you'll give that goat hair brush to Zeus, he deserves it.

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    1. I'm so glad, Allison! I may have to cave and give it to him since he seems to have misplaced this brush already!

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  3. Hahaha that was hilarious!! My first read of the morning, put a smile on my face! :D And I quote "unwilling to sacrifice that brush to this demeted cause" hahahaha :D Thanks for the laugh :) He's a cutie. My dogs LOVE my brushes. Not just my makeup brushes, they've destroyed my hair brushes, my combs, and a few of my makeup brushes. Thank goodness they lack classy taste though, and are not nearly as refined as Zeus!! :D <3

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    1. Hi Miki! I'm so glad that you started out the day with a smile on your face because of crazy Zeus! You are so welcome for the laugh! Oh no, your dogs ave done some damage to your brushes and combs as well. I don't know how refined Zeus is since he does so many perfectly savage things to his feline compatriots! Have a wonderful weekend! <3

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  4. This is so hilarious! I love your writing :) Silly kitty has good taste! LOL

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    1. I'm so glad that you enjoyed it! Thank you for your kind words about my writing :-) He does have good taste, but he's definitely one strange little dude!

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  5. Ahahahaha TANGO DOES IT, TOO!!! He doesn't favor goat. He likes all natural brushes, but the BETTER the quality, the more obsessed he is. He is actually very helpful when I want to know if an enclosed brush is natural or synthetic hair. I just show it to him. If he starts sniffing it like there is no tomorrow, it's natural hair. If he barely looks at it, synthetic!

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    1. LOL! That's awesome that Tango actually has some skills though! He is a natural brush authenticator!!!! That's awesome!

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    1. He is a fun cat. He has one blue eye and the other one is a gorgeous shade of amber!

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  7. Love it, love it, love it! My cat always loved brushes, too. These pictures are fantastic! >>>Say Hi to Zeus for me! ;)

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    1. I'm so glad that you loved this post! It was hard to take pictures with my phone in one hand while playing with him with the brush in my other hand! I will definitely say ho to him for you!

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  8. Zeus has good taste just like his mom. I'm sure when he reads this and finds out that he's been tricked though that you are in for more theft.

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    1. LOL!!!!! He definitely knows how to go after the good stuff, that's for sure! <3

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  9. LOL too cute! My dog thankfully has never had a thing for my makeup brushes (or my makeup), but my daughter loves to take my big powder brushes and rub them on her face (she's 2). It's the cutest thing ever lol

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    1. He's a funny kitty, that's for sure! You are very lucky that your dog isn't interested in your beauty picks! Mine have to remain behind closed doors– otherwise my cats bat them around! Now your daughter playing with your brushes is absolutely adorable! :-)

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  10. Hahaha I was just thinking about his obsession this morning while applying my own makeup! I wondered if he'd managed to steal all the good ones yet...
    And I consider myself very lucky that my own supreme fuzzy beings mostly ignore the vanity area! Lol

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    1. That is so sweet that you were thinking about my demented little goat-loving weirdo! I do what I can to keep them locked up from him, but he is one seriously determined cat. You can actually see him obsessing over the brushes, and whenever I open the bathroom door he appears out of nowhere. He is swift, agile and determined– and that combination guarantees that he will periodically prevail! You are very very lucky that your supreme fuzzy beings have little to no interest in your vanity area! Have a lovely weekend! <3

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  11. Meow, Zeus, you are so cute :).Hope you are enjoying your Caturday :).

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    1. Thank you, Musical! I am a very cute and strapping young man, indeed! Sometimes when I act super cute, though, my mom flashes me a look and says that I've "got something up my sleeve" I keep telling her that I don't wear shirts so I don't have sleeves! Everyday is Caturday to me!!!!!!!!

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  12. Kitty loves those brushes :)

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    1. He really really does! I think that he plots how to get th=o them all day long!

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  13. Aww, so cute! I had a cat who would 'do her makeup'. If I held out a powder brush and said 'do your makeup' she'd rub her face on the brush. Luckily, she wasn't interested in playing/chewing them any other time.

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    1. OMG, that is the cutest thing ever! It's amazing that she didn't have interest in playing with them any other time, and that she rubbed on command is absolutely charming!

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